Sunday, October 30, 2011

Behind Blue Eyes




From a distance you can hear me

Although no one might suspect

I live alone past the trees

Where no-one can object


My stony face grows colder

As the afternoon sun goes down

I fidget, squirm, trying to budge

But all i can do is frown



The silence grows eerie

As my soft tears turn hard

I try to wipe them quickly

Before my heart shatters to shards



The wind comforts me quickly,

like a leaf flowing in the breeze

Taking away the unbearing pain

I never had felt so lonely

Would my life ever be the same?



The trenching forest engulfs me

Threatening with no despair

I push and struggle, saving myself

But no-one wanted to care



I shimmer in the moonlight

Wanting to be free

My heart ached strongly

But, no-one could see me



My tears leak down my face, like a gushing tap

Dropping into a small growing pool

my face turns down, inquisitively

but I end up feeling like a fool



The light glimmers on my face

 Now the trees were gone

The seasons had changed quickly

I was happy not to mourn


I see them leering carefully

Their eyes as cautious as a cat

They move forward, approaching

I was giddy, bouncing like a brat



The tears re-appear

Not in sadness, but in joy

I smile and I smirk like a small happy child

But then, most importantly, I freeze and coy.

Friday, October 21, 2011

Some new photos today, I joined cycle 2 of beech modelling, its lingerie themed and I thought I would try something different. Although for some reason, on forums, my quality sucks ass, so now I have to say to judge full sized because its 100X better :/

This was the first asssignment, which was a simple bodyshot, im using my model Ivy Belle who happens to be one of my characters at the awesome PortVale.



I also finished up assignment 2 of agency, this was a creative runway and I went candy themed, probably the most editing ive ever done.



I am addicted to PortVale at the moment, my characters are:

Cooper Alexander:



and of course, Ivy Belle:



I actually got elimindated from my first ever competition, which was SNTM, I was a little disappointed, especially with so much effort into it, but I guess that was the judges opinions.



And lastly, I have released a fantasy competition called 'The Peacekeepers' its different to usual competitions, although i was told it was similar to another old competition called Terra.


:)

Ta Ta For Now

See You At Portvale

Horsey xx

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Orphan

I sat on the sidewalk in my dirty white singlet top and oversized wet jeans, it was a freezing winter night and I had nowhere to go, the wind swept through my auburn hair making my teeth chatter vigorously, I needed warmth but I had nowhere to get it, with desperation I ran quickly in my torn flats to the Osiris Library.  I walked across the tar road and into the smell of old books and new carpet, the librarian looked at me, she was obviously puzzled because the library happened to be closing in a few minutes, but I really didn’t care it was warm and that’s all I needed. The library was piled with rows and rows of books stacked alphabetically, it went on and on but finally I reached my destination a small closed off corner opposite to the blazing orange fire, I huddled closer to the fire absorbing its heat, my skin tingled with anticipation as I rubbed my hands together, it didn’t take long before my body was pulsing with warm blood. My eyes swept from side to side as the librarian walked past me, I was well hidden, hopefully she would leave without noticing me, I knew it was safe when I finally heard the large wooden door slam, It was just me in a warm library surrounded by darkness...
After another ten minutes I stood up to explore my surroundings, my eyes took a little while to adjust but I was now fully aware of what was happening, I walked slowly through the rows when I noticed the small children’s corner, I tip toed quietly around the corner and snuggled up to a small blanket that was sitting on the my little pony couch. I sat down on the small couch and pulled the blanket over my bare knees, a small book was sitting on the play table, I picked it up curiously, I never really experienced an education, I couldn’t read or write and sometimes I had trouble speaking, I flicked through the pages staring at small pictures of baby ducks and swans, the baby swan looked sad in most of the pictures but in the last two pages he looked happy, fulfilled, I thought to myself I wish I could feel something like that...
 It wasn’t long before a rush of sleepiness swept over me, I had no bed so I improvised the kiddie couch seemed like the best place to sleep so I laid my head down into the corner and burrowed into the small baby pink blanket, my eyes closed and I started slip into a deep slumber.
I awoke to rattles and clanks, the librarian must have arrived a short time ago, I sat up and stretched my long arms, my actions stopped when a small shadow appeared over my head, “Miss? Miss?  Are you alright? Can you hear me?” the person asked, I remained silent and just stared at the stranger, her hair was curled into a sleek braid and her face was well rounded, she ran frantically over to the librarian and pointed to me, great... I thought, the strange lady bent down and pulled me up still asking questions, “Miss can you hear me? Where do you live? Do you have anyone I can contact?” she rambled on and on while I just stood there with a blank look on my face, the grey haired librarian whispered something into the strange women’s ear and then faced me, speaking wisely “Miss can you please tell me where you live?” I frowned at them and decided to answer this one question, I stuttered the word nervously, “no...”
Both ladies stared at me with curiosity, “Miss?” the librarian stuttered, “can you at least tell me you name?” I didn’t know how to respond to that question though, through my whole 15 years of life I had never had a name it was as if I was a “thing” no one talked to me and this was the first time anyone had ever really took a good look at me, I stared at my feet with an absent mind, the librarian and the lady both whispered to each other and finally spoke together, “we are going to call you Gracie....”
Gracie I thought, I mean it was a nice name but it reminded me of a movie I had seen in a store before, what was it called again? A... Anni... ANNIE! That’s the one, the preview TV was playing it and she herself was an orphan only she liked tomorrow while I hated it, I wish I was invisible no one would notice me, I would be just fine. I stood up from the children’s couch and faced the two women, they both offered their hands to me and I shook them unknowingly, the only reason I knew how to do this was because of my observations on our large community, I always saw business men and women shaking hands, along with doctors, science people and just humans in general.
“So Gracie, can you tell us why you are here?” the women with the braided hair asked, I decided to tell them one thing, I wasn’t usually one for words but I felt like these two people may help me get a home, “I..I.. I don’t have a home..” I stuttered out nervously, I looked down at my grubby hands, they were shaking intensely, “well Gracie I think we should call the orphanage or the foster home to find out a tad more about you before we decide where you are going,” the librarian called before walking down to the telephone on her wooden desk, along with the strange women.
 
I paced through the rows of books tempted to just flee from this mess but I wanted somewhere to sleep tonight so I continued walking, I heard distant mutters from the librarian and by the sound of it she wasn’t pleased. It wasn’t long before the librarian came back with a broad smile on her face, she pulled me next to her speaking as she walked, “Gracie we have just been on the phone and the foster carers have organised an urgent meeting for you, in other words parents are coming to interview you,” I gasped at the last sentence the librarian said, I was going to have to talk to strange parents? Well my chance of getting adopted went from 50% to nil.
We arrived at the Adoption centre 30 minutes after leaving the library, Pauline the librarian had offered to drive me considering I had no other way of transport. I hid behind Pauline as she explained to the office man who I was, he leaned to the left and smiled as he saw me blush an embarrassing red, despite the fact I was nervous I shuffled along into the green interview room. Pauline forced me to sit in the white wooden chair before whispering in my ear, “good luck Gracie, be nice and try to talk to the parents,” and then I fare welled the only lady that had ever cared for me, “goodbye...” I whimpered under my breath.
The first parents arrived shortly after Pauline left, they questioned me, I replied in the best way possible, they smiled, I shook their hands and they walked away, this happened three or four times only with different parents, I fiddled with my fingernails before turning to see the next parents, the women was beautiful, she wore a sleek summer dress with flower patterns, a pair of small yellow wedges and her light hazel hair was tied back in a smooth bun, while the man wore a white button up shirt, a pair of clean black denim jeans and rough black spiked hair, they were the best looking parents I had ever seen! I smiled brightly at the parents and attempted to talk to them, “hi I’m Gracie, I am here to interview you,” Oh crap I said it wrong; they are interviewing me not the other way round! “It’s nice to meet you Gracie,” the women said before sitting in front of me, “I am Lauren and this is my fiancĂ©e Dane,” “Hi Dane,” I called, “Nice to meet you Gracie,” “you too,” I muttered, “now on with the questions?” I asked.
It took an hour to finish the interview, the parents seemed really interested in my life and insisted on me to explain it all unfortunately I don’t really have anything special in my life, the best memory I had was when I got a free hug from a strange man, apparently he was doing an operation over the internet to get 10,000 hugs and I got one, it was the best memory I had and that’s pretty pathetic if you ask me, but these 2 people seemed interested in me and that’s all I wanted to have someone to fuss over me in the morning, to have boy troubles and have someone to talk, to sit down and eat all night while watching your favourite movie with the ones you love, that’s all I ever wanted, to have that bond...
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> 
I was left in the green room while the office man talked to Lauren and Dane, I picked at my long nails until the door finally swung open, the officer walked up to me and cocked his head to face me and said...
“Congratulations Gracie, you are now the adopted daughter of Lauren and Dane Walker...” I sprung from my seat happily, hugging the officer, it felt really awkward considering he was like a 70 year old, I had never really experienced feelings like this before, I had a spring in my step and I felt as if I were glowing, it felt like it was all a dream, I was now someone’s daughter, I belonged to someone, they loved me for me.....
I followed Lauren and Dane out into the reception room, we signed multiple sheets of papers and then we were free to go. I trudged out into the spring rain and began to walk down the street, “Gracie?” Dane called, “where are you going?” I looked at him with an absent face, “ummmm I don’t exactly know, where do I go?” I stuttered, “This way my new daughter,” Lauren said gesturing to a large black car, “WOW! Really?” I shouted, these parents were awesome, “What sort of car is it?” “I’ll answer that,” Dane barged in, “it’s a 2011 Hummer, one of the best cars in the USA,” I hopped into the large car, it was so roomy, leather seats, a big electronic stereo and best of all an air conditioner, I could get used to this, I thought before buckling myself in...
We sped onto the highway and listened to some easy listening music, I was nervous about where I was going to be living. We turned off of the highway and drove down a long scenic path, I stared at the horses, deer, swans and ponds behind the fence, they were magical, it was like I was day dreaming, but only it was real, this was happening, I was getting a home...
I hopped out of the car and observed my surroundings, I gaped at the large house in front of my eyes, it was enormous, fit for the king or queen, something was up, why would two normal people live such a luxurious life? I stared at the house, it features a large water feature, a creamy white paint, a dark brown roof and at least 100 acres of land, it was like heaven, heaven I’m in heaven, I thought to myself before running up to my new parents. I stood in the doorway and took in my surroundings, the floor was a warm brown and the walls were painted a skilful whitish blue, I took my first step into the house and my mother Lauren whispered, “Welcome home...”

Shimmer

The dark island surrounded me, deer grazed behind the blossoming blue bushes and swans swam on the reflecting pond, this island looked peaceful but in fact it was a miserable hellhole for us mystical outsiders with dark, evil powers. I guess the reason I was abandoned here was all because of my powers, if it were not for them, I would be living peacefully with my family, my god forsaken family...
Tears leaked down my elf shaped face, my charcoal eyeliner smudging in the process; I held my small hand up against my face and wiped one tiny, salty tear of my pale cheek, being a mystical creature wasn’t easy, especially when 1. The government are hunting you down, 2. Not everyone is who they seem to be and 3. I was a banshee...
Banshees have existed for thousands of years but they were rarely born as one at the start, it just so happens, I was. I was abandoned by my parents as soon as I turned 10 years old, that was when my powers started to develop, sometimes I would cry all night wailing for the pain in my head to stop, but it never did and it still does, I briefly remember my family but my memories have been hazy since my full change, one thing that I will never forget is the bullying by the normal fairies, while I changed.
 It was a usual day at Mystics Forest; I was playing energetically with my sister Nimmie when a taller, more powerful group of fairies stood over me, they screeched terrifying names at me, shouting at me, calling me an evil gift from God, it was the worst day in my life, it didn’t help either when I arrived home, my parents looked at me with shock, my eyes had turned from a soft green to a dark cloudy... black.
I let my dark blue and black wings stretch out of my body and battered them together quickly, in no time I was soaring lightly through the air, the breeze hit my face and adrenaline rushed into my body, it was one of the best parts of flying, being able to feel the rush of the elements and make a quick escape if you are threatened or in danger.
I landed swiftly on a large grey rock that was lying on the coast shore; it seemed the perfect place o sleep the night especially if I needed to escape as it would act as a great runway. I crouched on the rock and made myself comfortable, wrapping my soft agile wings around me for warmth.
Throughout my life I had noticed that my dreams were real things that happened, gruesome things, I always had nightmares about murders or suicides and would wake up panting, screaming and sweating, begging for my horrible gift to go away, nothing worked though.
I awoke the next morning, panting and screaming just as I predicted, it was really getting on my nerves and sometimes I felt like killing myself, the world wouldn’t really care, I am an outcast that has twenty million dollars hanging over my head if I am brought back, dead to the government. I heard a twig snap and turned around quickly in shock, there stood a man, only it wasn’t just a man, it was a vampire; he spoke softly but darkly “good morning...  Elysia.” 

Welcome To The Jungle

Welcome To The JungleIt stood on the lone track, its black fur glimmering darkly in the shaded sun, its striped tail swinging side to side aggressively, low growls escaped the creature’s throat, wanting me to back off, but I wasn’t going anywhere, I was going to finish this mission whether I lived or died.
My name is Xavier Landon, I am a naturalist who treks the unknown Jungles of Peru along with me is my team of four: Abbi Hawkins, Rick Marshall, Alexis Buck and Jackson Thomas.
My team and I are have been involved in many missions and each of them a success and I was planning for this mission to be as well. My geologist Alexis Buck has been researching our mission over the week and so far the undiscovered animal had made its moves every kilometre, but why was this animal being so precise?
3 days earlier....
I sat in the cool plastic chair, fidgeting in my seat, waiting for the lieutenant to arrive. Abbi sat next to me writing notes on the mysterious animal that was appearing in different places on the Peruvian Track, this was the reason I was here sitting in Area 5, a secret army camp, location: UNKNOWN.
The lieutenant walked in professionally and took a seat in front of his antique desk. He flicked on the TV without saying a word and slid a video into the video player. A news report surged onto the TV, a male reporter was standing at the beginning of the Peruvian track, his face looked worried but he looked determined to finish the report. I watched the reporter’s actions, it was at that moment I noticed its alien eyes glowing darkly behind a thick palm tree, its claws stretched with anticipation and at that moment the animal lunged at the young man from behind, he gurgled, shrieked and screamed but nothing could stop this animal, it grasped the man’s thin neck and with that he was dead.
The lieutenant switched the television off and returned to his seat, he placed his hands on the desk and then spoke, “Professor Landon, as you just saw, an alien animal has been found in the vast jungle of Peru, the reason I bought you here? Well your mission is to find this animal and research it from a distance, try not to kill yourself and your team, if we don’t hear from you in 56 hours we are claiming that you are dead.”

I watched the animal; it was crazy, murderous, psychotic even! We were face to face, it’s breath stunk of rotting flesh and its fangs were dripping with fresh saliva and blood.  All I could do is hope that my trusty hand knife would be enough to kill it. We circled each other for 2 minutes; I needed to think of a plan fast!
At that moment, it leaped onto my body, battling me, wanting my blood. How did I stop this animal? Well that is for another time...


Authors Notes - One of my short stories from awhile ago, hehe